Hi, I’m Toni!
I help families learn to cultivate the connection they need to enjoy the harmonious relationships they want!
My Approach to family life…
Parenting is Hard – I get it.
Even though being a parent can be fulfilling, inspiring and deeply gratifying, it’s also extremely tiring, frequently frustrating, unexpectedly challenging and even truly terrifying on occasion.
If you’re a parent, you know exactly what I mean.
Nevertheless, I wouldn’t trade being a parent for any other role. I love being my kid’s mom, and I work hard to be the parent that I deeply value, and… I’ve helped a few other families along the way.
But right up front, before you read any further, I want you to know that just because my services are highly sought-after as a Family Life & CBP Specialist, this doesn’t mean that I have “mastered” demonstrating to my family the same grace that I myself need on a daily basis; either because I am at the brink of fleeing my home with my hair virtually on fire or contemplating the removal of some younger person’s head at any given moment!
Parenting is indeed both an incredible privilege as well as an equally incredible challenge.
god is in our Parenting.
So let me encourage us to remember that Jesus repeatedly reassured His followers that they would not be alone after His ascension to Heaven. He is with you in your parenting! Just like the panic the disciples must have felt as they realized that Jesus did not intend to stay with them, I myself have often felt panic as I’ve thought for sure the moment was coming soon that I was going to crucify my own kids!
However, Jesus PROMISED that His Father would send His Mighty Spirit to be of continuous help and companionship. In fact, when He did show up, they did POWERFUL things in His name!
I am convinced more than ever that we must embrace this understanding in our parenting. Powerful things still happen in His name, and they can happen in us too! God NEVER leaves us alone as His children to figure this life out on our own, including our parenting. He always responds to our needs, and He is constantly at work to conform us to the image of Christ and emulate Him in the way we take care of our families.
There is also so much encouragement there that God Himself is always at work in us to both will (desire) and to do (move toward) that which brings about His good pleasure.
Our part is to cooperate with that work. I am so grateful that He is always able to do exceedingly and abundantly beyond anything that we can ask or imagine! There is simply no obstacle or issue that we face that is too great for Him to overcome!
parenting is a skill
As parents, I believe most of us are striving to do our best to bring up the next generation.
I think that the word striving best describes this process because creating the connection necessary to help our kids reach adulthood with a full deck requires the cultivation of some serious skills!
If you were not raised by parents or caregivers who modeled these skills, then they will be new to you. That’s ok!
The good news is that compassion-based parenting is a skill, and you can cultivate this approach just like you would learn any other new skill.
So, if like me, you ever wished your kids came with an owner’s manual, or that God would just download the best way to do things at any given moment, or that your temper would magically disappear at those times you find it impossible to control it, you are absolutely NOT alone.
You can LEARN!
I specialize in a research supported approach to family life called Compassion-Based Parenting (CBP).