What parent doesn’t want their kids to feel confident, resilient, and comfortable in their own skin. Unfortunately, our kiddo’s can start to believe they must perform to be loved, and this may lead to a cycle of perfectionism.
A great practice to help combat this is to embrace the “Mistake of the Day.” Each day, ask your child, “What was your biggest mistake today?” Next ask, “What did you learn from it?” This simple, open question shifts the focus from avoiding making mistakes to celebrating them as learning opportunities.
Make sure to celebrate their answer. Acknowledge the courage it takes to talk about our mistakes, and explore together what they learned. This daily habit teaches children that making mistakes is normal, valuable, and part of learning, which is essential for building resilience.
Celebrating mistakes is actually more important than celebrating achievements. This is because when we only focus on outcomes or achievements, we are unintentionally sending the message that our kids are only as good as their latest success. Focusing on how they are growing helps our kids internalize that they are loved and valued for who they are, not just for what they accomplish. This helps them build a secure sense of self that doesn’t depend on others’ approval.
Through practices like the “Mistake of the Day” and affirming their inherent worth, we create an environment where children feel safe to try, stumble, and grow. This isn’t just about preventing perfectionism; it’s about fostering a foundation of security and acceptance that allows our kids to take risks and learn without fear.
When kids know they’re loved unconditionally, they’re more willing to tackle challenges, make mistakes, and grow through them. Over time, they’ll feel secure enough to reach for their potential—not to earn approval, but because they know they’ll be supported and loved no matter what.
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